Our journey through adoption.

Looking back on the last few months I’ve learned some lessons…we’ve been on the list now for 5 months…and there have been good days and bad days…short days and long days…happy days and sad days…in this waiting process. When I look back on the good days, the short days, the happy days I feel blessed to have those days, they keep me going. But when I look back on the bad days, the long days the sad days I recognize it is in those days that I’ve learned much more important lessons: lessons about faith, patience, friendship, dedication, trust…if my life was always good…easy…happy…then I wouldn’t need anything or anyone…I wouldn’t need to have faith in the Lord…I wouldn’t know the true meaning of friendship…because in those bad days is where I learn how faith and friendship works…its so true! We as humans don’t like to suffer, we don’t like the bad days, we don’t like to fail…it doesn’t feel good…but I think for most of us if we look back on those days we do realize that those are the days where we’ve learned lives greatest lessons. I receive daily devotions from Pastor Greg Laurie and today he wrote about this, how if we were to write out how we would want our lives to be then we would write “green lights and blue skies”…but the Lord is all purposeful, He allows every single detail and event in our life to unfold for purposes…and they are to teach us lessons! I know that I don’t have the strengh to get through this life on my own…I need Him and I need family/friends by my side to give me encouragement and strength..to remind me when I need reminding to keep my faith…and on those good days, days of happiness and celebration for sucesses, it wouldn’t be the same without having the Lord to thank and give credit to, it wouldn’t be the same without having family/friends to celebrate with…so the major lessons I’m learning is that we have good days and we have bad days, the Lord allows both, both for His purpose, to teach me lessons I need to learn…and I want to learn…so I praise Him for both the good times and the bad times! I want to grow as a person…and in order for me to grow in faith, to grow my friendships…to learn.. I know that goods days will define me and bad days will define me…so I do want both! 

Last week we received news that we are #10 on the adoption list. We started as #24…what does this mean for us? It only means that if there were a birthmom who chose not to make the choice about where to place her baby, the couple that is #1 on the list will be placed with that baby. We obviously have some more climbing to do, but it was pretty neat to hear that we are moving up…we also learned that this situation came up last month…a baby boy was born in a local hospital and his birthmom chose not to “choose”…so a blessed family received “the call” to come meet their baby boy…they were on the list for 9 months (which means that is the couple out of the entire agency that was on the list the longest)…so as we have passed our 5th month on the list it gives us hope…we’ve moved up 14 spots on that list only the Lord knows what our story is going to be…a random call or a birthmom choosing us from the start of her pregnancy…I expect to have some more good days and hard days through this waiting process…but I’m all for it…because I dream about the day we meet our little one…and get to celebrate with the Lord and our family/friends…

As you can probably tell by now I really enjoy poems…here is one I recently read:

Waiting by Amber Kersenbrock

Waiting, waiting, God knows best. Waiting, waiting, so hard in Him to rest. I want what I want, I want it right away. Don’t want to wait to wait for one more day.

God I thought your children were blessed? Why must you put me through this waiting test? Haven’t you heard my fervent pleas? This desire that’s brought me to my knees?

Again and again, to You I plead Knowing a child is what I need. A baby to feel the ache in my arms A little one to bless me with his many charms.

Be still, my child, wait for Me. I know what’s best, can’t you see? You must learn patience; patience and trust To lean on Me, that is a must.

Yes, child, I have heard your prayer And you surely know how much I care. I have known you from the very start, And rejoiced to have a place in your heart.

I want to bless you, but in My own time and way. Remember, to Me, a thousand years is but a day. I’ve watched you struggle, and watched you grow, when the time is right, I will know. For now, my child, be content in Me. Keep learning and growing, so you may see. My plans for you are many and great! I promise it will be worth the wait!